Forever Crimson
by yikkety
Summary: Slightly AU- Rory chooses Harvard over Yale. She never sleeps with Dean. Jess still leaves, goes to Philly all that. I think I am going to rate it M because of language, I think a non-network TV Jess would have had quite the mouth, and sexual situations, no smut but description it happened.
1. Chapter 1

**So here is my proof that I should no write tired. I was just so excited to get this published, though I should have been working on my other WIPs or doing Mom/wife things during spring break. I am changing the name because I got Stanford's mascot mixed with Harvrd's. I have no idea how often this will be updated. **

Rory was surprised by the knock on her door, it was 6:30 on a Wednesday and her roommate, Heidi was out. There was no one she could imagine that would be coming to visit her at this time. She opened the door and almost passed out, seeing who was on the other side.

"Jess, Oh my God," she gushed breathlessly, shocked to see her former boyfriend at the door. "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you, and I have something for you." He said as he removed his arms form behind his back, producing a book. He handed it to her with a smile on his face.

She took the book and read the cover out loud, her eyes lighting up as she did, "The Subsect by Jess, you wrote a book?"

"It's not that great." He said with a shy smile. She moved away from the door allowing him entrance to the room. Rory took a seat on a bed in one corner of the room, Jess sat on the desk chairs closest to her. She continued to go on about the book and he continued to downplay it's importance, telling her the story of the small publishing house in Philadelphia, where he worked, that agreed to print 100 copies. "I really wanted to give you a copy, since I couldn't have done it without you."

The sentiment had almost brought Rory to tears, she had always known he was capable of great things and was so proud that he had done it. "Thank you, but you don't owe me. It was all you. I always knew you could do it." They smiled gratefully at each other. Rory suddenly stood up, "Hey, I need to make a really quick phone call." Jess nodded as she made her way put into the hall. After a few minutes she came back in and apologized for leaving.

"It's okay, uhm, am I keeping you from something?"

"No," Rory lied, knowing Jess saw right through it she told him about the phone call, "I was supposed to be meeting someone at a coffee shop on campus, but I cancelled."

"Rory, you didn't need to do that. I didn't mean to mess up your plans, I can go." Jess said as he began to get up from the chair.

"No, Jess, don't leave. This is perfect actually. I didn't want to go anyway." Jess cocked an eyebrow. "Heidi set it up, according to her, I get less action than a eunuch." Jess snorted back laughter and she slapped his shoulder playfully. "Hey, I didn't come to Harvard for the dating scene." She was happy to spend her nights studying or reading, rather than dealing with awkward dates. "So," she changed the subject, "what's Philadelphia like?" He started to talk to her about Truncheon and his friends, she was in awe of this man in front of her. "I can't believe you drove five hours just to give me a book."

"It's because of you that there is a book, so I felt like I needed to give you a copy myself." She smiled and leaned in slightly, Jess took the hint and closed the gap between them, pressing his lips to hers. The kiss started light and innocent, but quickly turned heated as their hands began exploring each others bodies. They each knew the others body, even after all this time. She fell back on to her bed and pulled him down on top of her. They were lost in a familiar pattern that had once been a part of their everyday lives. Rory locked her arms around Jess's back as his hands slid under her shirt. She moaned and broke the contact of their mouths, as his hand made contact with one of her nipples through her thin bra. She threw her head back and he moved his attention to her neck and could feel her nipples harden under his touch. She began to buck her hips into him and grind into his increasingly hardening crotch. He groaned and pulled away form her, "Rory," he said roughly as he tried to get the blood in his body to flow back to his brain. "Rory, stop,"he whispered as he pushed himself up and moved to sit against the headboard.

She stared at him panting and red faced. Her eyes were dilated with desire as she questioned him, "did I do something wrong?"

He picked up her hand and kissed her fingers, smiling at her. "No, we just needed to stop. I don't want it to be like this." When she cocked her head in confusion he clarified. "I want it to be special."

"I-I'm not," Rory couldn't finish her statement, "I'm not a virgin," she said with a deep breath.

"That's not surprising, neither am I. But that doesn't mean I think you deserve some random quick fuck, you deserve candles and chocolate covered strawberries and all the other crap you see in romantic movies."

Rory giggled uncomfortably and blushed, "I didn't get that. At the beginning of last year I started seeing this guy named Mark from my poli-sci class. I had fun with him and really liked him. When he suggested I spend the night while his roommate was away I knew what he was planning, but I figured that I was 20 years old so I probably needed to lose my virginity. It wasn't fun, I cried as soon as I left the next morning. Three days later, he dumped me." Rory was on the verge of tears after sharing her story with Jess. He just squeezed the hand that he had been holding reassuringly, kissed her cheek chastely and rubbed his other hand down her back.

"You deserved better,Rory. I'm sorry that that was your experience." he said as he held her face in his hands. She blinked and a tear slowly dripped out of each eye. She took a deep breath and tried to smile. She was hungry and asked if he wanted to get something with her at a local diner.

She munched on a burger and coffee as butterflies danced in her stomach. It was crazy, this was Jess. They had eaten together tons of times, sitting across from him shouldn't make her feel like this. She tried to make small talk, but he could tell she had something on her mind and called her on it. She took a large drink of her coffee to steady herself before asking the question on her mind. "Did-did my decision to come here effect your decision to leave?"

Jess choked on his sandwich, "what?"

"I know you wanted me to go to Yale since it was closer to home and I've always felt like me choosing Harvard is part of the reason you left." Rory admitted.

"Ror," Jess croaked out, "I can't believe you would think that. Harvard was your dream, I knew that long before we were dating. I'm glad you chose Harvard, if you would have chosen Yale because of me I would have felt horrible, especially because of what happened." He took Rory's hands from across the table and looked into her eyes, "running was stupid ans I never should have done it but I was lost and pissed. I was flunking out of school. My uncle and I were not speaking, my dad came to town to see me and ughh," Jess ran his hands through his hair in frustration. "I felt like a horrible failure, and here you were going to Harvard. You couldn't be the girl at an Ivy League school with a boyfriend back home who worked at Wal-Mart because he flunked out of high school. Fuck, Rory, I couldn't do that to you." Jess pushed his plate away, appetite gone, Rory just stared across the table mouth open in shock. She didn't know what to say to him, so she reached across the table and grabbed his hand. He lifted his head to look at her. His eyes were pleading, but all she could do was rub her thumb lightly over his knuckles. She got up and walked to his side pf the booth. She sat down and pulled him into a tight lingering hug. He reluctantly wrapped his arms around her and kissed her temple, having Rory back in his arms was worth the last few years of pain. He just wished it was going to last longer than the next hour or so.

"Jess, you wrote a book. How could I not be proud of you?" He didn't know hat to say. She hadn't read the book yet, so there was no way for her to know that had it not been for his leaving the subject matter of his book wouldn't have existed. Being at a loss for words, he tilted her head toward his face and kissed her softly. Then he looked at her and said, "I love you, Rory." He didn't think before he said it, not that he hadn't said those words to her before, but last time he had left before she had a chance to respond. Now as he looked at her, the gorgeous blue eyes, the nervous way she was biting her lip, he knew why he had left after he said it last time. His heart couldn't handle the rejection from the beautiful woman who had made his life worth living the last few years. "Don't say anything, just know that I do, I always have." Rory just nodded.

They quickly decided that they were no longer hungry. Rory paid the bill and they made the way back to her dorm room. She unlocked the door with the hand that wasn't holding his. She opened the door and leaned against the door jamb, pulling him into a kiss she didn't want to end. When she reluctantly pulled away she asked, "where are you staying tonight? You can't possibly be planning on driving back to Philly."

He leaned in and laid soft kisses on her face and forehead, "no, I was just gonna sleep in my car."

"Jess, it's cold, you can't sleep in your car! Do you still have the same car?" She remembered the night in Stars Hollow that he had slept in it.

"Yeah," he nodded, "it's a couple of blocks away. I thought if I tried to drive it on to campus I might get arrested."

Rory chuckled before saying, "I don't want you to have to sleep in your car. You should stay here." At the skeptical look on his face she said, "just to sleep. I promise I wont try to defile you in the middle of the night." She pulled him into the room and pouted until he agreed. She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him hard. When he pulled away and asked for a pillow and extra blanket she gave him a weird look.

"What, your bed's really small?"

"Oh, God forbid you have to touch me." She meant it as a joke but her voice betrayed her and he could see the hurt behind her smile.

"It's not that I don't want to touch you, it's that I'm afraid if I start I won't want to stop." He said as he wrapped an arm around her waist. She settled her head on his shoulder, promising to be good, with a smirk that could impress even him. She had a small TV on her desk and the two snuggled under the covers and flipped through the channels. After a couple of hours watching bits and pieces of things, Jess noticed Rory's increasing yawning. "You should sleep," he whispered to her, "you have class in the morning. I assume."

"Not until nine," she said softly into the shoulder she was laying on. She yawned again.

Jess switched off her TV. "Go to sleep, Rory."

"I don't want to." Rory sat up and faced Jess, "if I go to sleep then morning will come quicker and I don't want this night to end. I don't want to wake up and have you leave." Rory was crying by the end of her protest.

Jess sat up and held her face in his hands. He looked into those beautiful eyes filled with tears, it broke his heart to see her cry. He pulled her closer and kissed her softly and passionately. When he pulled away he said, "it won't be like before, I'm not running away from anything. I just have to go back to my job and my apartment, but I won't let the distance keep us apart. I won't. I love you too much for that. This is our second chance, I wont ruin it." When Rory just stared at him dumbfounded he started to panic about what he had said to her. "Oh, God, Rory. I didn't mean to say all that to you, I-. Please don't think that I came here thinking this book was my ticket to getting you back." Jess had started to get up from the bed to gather his shoes and coat. " I just thought that the way things were going tonight that you had forgiven me and were willing to give me another shot, but if that's not what you want then I can go."

"Stop. Are you listening to yourself? Why do you think I wanted you to stay and that the thought of you leaving made me sad? I love you, Jess. And I do want this, I want us. I just don't know how to make it work and I'm scared." She cried while reaching out for him to return to the bed.

"I don't know either, but I do know that I want to be with you. You're all I think about, Rory. I work a lot so that I don't have to think about you. But when I am trying to sleep or I have a day off, I think about you. All the shit I put you through, the way I left and came back and left again. I hate myself for putting you through that. I just, all I ever wanted was for you to forgive me."

"I do forgive you, Jess, I'm just scared. I want to trust you, I do, but I don't think I can handle you hurting me again." Then she had a thought. "Come to Thanksgiving with me."

"What?"

"Come to Stars Hollow for Thanksgiving. I'm sure Luke would love to have you, and your Mom." Jess groaned at the mention of his mom. "Jess it would make me really happy if you would come," then she added more suggestively, "really happy." Jess cocked an eyebrow. "You say that you want to prove to me that you've changed, this is how. Come to Stars Hollow, a place that drives you crazy, and have dinner with Luke and me and all the other crazy Stars Hollow citizens."

"That's what you really want?"

"Yup."

"You'll go to sleep if I agree to it?" Rory nodded. "Fine," Jess moaned, "the things I do to make you happy." She kissed him quickly and laid back down. He followed, pulling her into his arms. The two fell quickly and happily to sleep.

A few hours later the door creaked open and a gasp and a snicker woke Jess. A woman around their age was looking down at him with a look of strange delight on her face. The commotion woke Rory and as soon as her eyes were open she saw her roommate staring at her and Jess, "I was kinda pissed when I found out you bailed on Eric, but now that I see that you've found your own hot piece of ass, I can forgive you."

"Jeez," Jess groaned, rolling his eyes and falling back onto the bed.

Heidi snickered and Rory blushed, "go to bed, Heidi."

"You want me to sleep in the common room to give you guys more privacy?" She smiled.

"No, we're just sleeping," Rory said as she snuggled back into Jess.

"Are you sure?" Heidi singsonged. Jess flipped her off while throwing his arm back over Rory, and mumbled something about her being "and annoying bitch" before falling back to sleep.

When Rory woke the next morning she was pleasantly surprised to find herself wedged between the wall and Jess's warm back. She kissed his shoulder, causing him to wake and roll over. He smiled when her saw those gorgeous blue eyes staring down at him, "hey," he grunted barely awake.

"Hey," she smiled back, "breakfast?" He nodded, sitting up and getting his shirt off the floor and allowing Rory room to get up and get dressed. As the couple made their way out of the dorm, they passed Heidi in the common room doing yoga.

"How long has she been your roommate?" Jess asked curious as to how Rory could deal with someone so unlike her.

"A couple years," Jess's expression made Rory giggle, "what?" she asked still amused.

"She seems annoying, how do you stand it?"

"She is annoying, she's really into yoga and she's a vegan," Jess scrunched up his face causing Rory to giggle again, "I like to eat bacon cheeseburgers and chili fries in the room to drive her crazy."

"She seemed happy to see me last night?"

"She's kinda slutty and I don't date much, so it'll be fun for her to tease me about it."

"Sorry," Jess said sheepishly. Rory just kissed him to let him know she didn't mind.

The two had breakfast, discussing how they were going make a long distance relationship work and exchanged numbers. When Rory had to get ready for class, she regretfully left Jess to walk back to his car with a lingering kiss. She spent the rest of the day floating through her classes, with a tingling feeling all over.

**Wow, that was bad. Thank you to those of you who reviewed and let me know in a nice way that it needed fixing. I will never force myself to stay up 2 hours after my bedtime to push out a chapter again. **


	2. A Very Stars Hollow Thanksgiving Part 1

**A/N I know this has taken forever, and the chapter started to get away from me, so I decided to split it and post the first part now. Hope you enjoy!**

Chapter 2: A Very Stars Hollow Thanksgiving part 1

Rory took the earliest bus out of Boston on Wednesday morning, arriving in Stars Hollow just in time for an early lunch. Knowing that the inn would be busy today he made her way to Luke's.

"Rory," Luke greeted her happily when he came out of the kitchen carrying, where he noticed her perched on a stool. Lane was already pouring her coffee.

"Hey, Luke. I am so looking forward to tomorrow. I hope you have enough food," she added with a giggle as her pancakes and fries were placed in front of her.

A few hours later she was changing the laundry over to the dryer, The Clash blaring from her room, when she heard a knock on the door. She ran into her room to turn down the music before rushing to answer it.

"Why'd you turn it off?" Jess asked with his trademark smirk.

She pulled him into the house and her arms, "I didn't know you were coming today," she said between kisses.

"Didn't know if I would make it and I didn't want to get your hopes up just to let you down." He left the words _more than I already have_ unspoken. They made their way back to Rory's room , Jess turned the music back up before turning back around and looking at Rory. She was wearing an oversized Harvard hoodie and grey sweats. He smiled before pulling her back into his arms, how she could look so sexy dressed like that, he would never know.

She steered them back out into the living room and onto the couch where they could talk. They had spent most of the last month calling or texting nearly everyday. While Jess had never been a fan of cellphones and texting and the self importance that came with feeling like you were always going to miss a call, he was happy he had given in before his reconciliation with Rory. Realizing that they didn't have as much to catch up on as each of them did with others in the city, they got caught up on the physical part they both craved.

Before long her had removed her hoodie, revealing a thin cami, he could see the outline of her hardened nipples through it. He lightly brushed his thumb over one as he moved his attention to her clavicle. She snaked her hands up his sides, taking his shirt along with them. As she pulled the t-shirt over his head, their moughs were forced apart, his came back down on her chest, lightly biting one a nipple through her shirt, causing her to let out a gasping moan. Her hands immediately began tugging at his belt. As she fumbled with the buckle he slid off her cami as well, she was completly toppless in front of him and he stopped to revel in her beauty. She had finally gotten the belt undone and moved to unbutton his jeans when he stopped her. She looked at him her blue eyes ablaze with lust. He scoped her up and carried her from the couch to her room, softly laying her on the bed. He let his jeans fall to the floor, before crawling on the bed and hovering over her. She watched him lustfully noticing his taut olive skin as his muscles flexed while he crawled up the bed, dropping kisses along her torso as he made his way up. When he arrived back at her mouth, he kissed her passionately, "Jess," Rory breathed out, when he pulled away, reversing his earlier path slowly sliding her underpants down as he did.

They were jolted from their coupling by a loud banging and a crash coming from the living room. Jess jumped off her in a panic and grabbed his jeans as Rory scrambled for something to cover herself. "Shit," Jess mumbled as he realized his shirt was still in the living room. Rory had thrown on an oversized t-shirt and gym shorts before running out to the couch just as her mother picked up the mens shirt that had been discarded.

The two made eye contact and Lorelai uttered, "taken to cross dressing recently," much louder than necessary, "cuz I gotta tell ya Babe, I don't think it's the right look for you." The door to Rory's room opened and an annoyed looking Jess came stalking out. Lorelai almost fell over when she saw who her daughter had just been with. Her eyes went to Rory and her mouth opened though no words came out. Jess sat down and quickly put on his shoes before grabbing the short form Lorelais outstretched finger.

"I'll call you in a little bit," he said pulling the shirt over his head and grabbing his coat on the way out.

"Jess?" Lorelai questioned. Rory said nothing, knowing that her mother wasn't really asking a question, not yet anyway. "How...what...why…?" Lorelai had to stop and take a breath before she could complete her thought. "When did you two start speaking again, and the answer better not be today."

"He came to see me a few weeks ago." Lorelai just continued to look at her daughter, needing more of an explanation. "He wrote a book and wanted to give me one of the first copies."

"He wrote a book?" Lorelai wondered why Luke didn't know this information yet, or if he did and was just keeping it from her.

"Yeah, just got it published, he wanted to give me a copy and thank me for inspiring him."

"So you just jumped into bed with him after everything?"

"NO," Rory was becoming very irritated with her mom. "We've been talking almost everyday since then. He's changed a lot Mom; grown up."

"I just didn't realize that he was back in your life, or that he would be."

"I didn't know he would ever be back in my life either, but I'm glad he is."

Lorelai flopped onto the couch, patting the cushion next to her for Rory. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Well, I was under the impression that you may not react well to the news; clearly I was mistaken." She smirked.

"Okay, so I took an admittedly uncool stance, but I am no longer channeling my mother. I just didn't expect to walk in and find you and Jess, or anyone really, having sex."

"We weren't having _sex_," Rory's face turned bright red. "We were headed in a decidedly sexual direction, but there was no sex."

"I just," Lorelai searched for the right words, "he hurt you so bad last time. I don't want that to ever happen again." Lorelai knew, much as she hated to admit it, that her daughter was an adult and had to be allowed to make her own decisions, no matter how disastrous they may be.

"I've grown up a lot too, Mom." Rory said seemingly to draw the subject to a close as she got up and headed back to her room.

…...

"I knew I'd find you here." Rory's voice beside him made Jess look up from his book. She sat down next to him on the old wooden planks, and leaned her head on his shoulder. "Sorry, about earlier."

Jess shrugged and wound his arm around her, "it is what it is."

"You're not mad, are you?"

"At you?" He questioned, "no, not even really at Lorelai. More, _frustrated _really." Rory giggled at his double meaning.

"We'll have to find some time before I head back to school.

"And someplace where your Mom doesn't have a key?"

**A/N2 Sorry for the wonky formatting, I had to copy and paste from google docs and my laptop wasn't cooperatinh**


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